letter (dean)

[hungergames]

Evangeline watched the owl take off. Oh, how she wished that she was that owl, flying away, far away. Of course, she wasn't. Evangeline couldn't believe her mother had been killed three months prior, exactly. It hurt. Her scars began to itch, as they often did when she thought about her mother. That owl was carrying a letter to her father, just to talk. It was amazing, how close they were now. Tears began falling from her cheeks, at the fact her mother was totally gone, lost. Dead. She didn't hear the footsteps behind her, didn't hear the door to the owlery creak open.

[littlebit]

Dean made his way up to the owlery, he often went there to think when the Ravenclaw commons were too crowded for his liking. He had not been expecting to see Evangeline there, crying. Instantly his protective instincts kicked in and he walked straight to her side and put his arm around her shoulders. Dean didn't say anything, he knew that he didn't need to. He just had to be there for Evangeline, have a shoulder for her to cry on.

[hungergames]

Evangeline turned instinctively into Dean's protective embrace. She sobbed quietly into his shirt, gripping him as if she could sap strength from his body. Eventually, she took a shuddering breath, sitting back and looking up at Dean. She frowned, her eyes puffy and unattractively red. "I'm sorry," she muttered, eyes wide with shame.

[littlebit]

"For what?" asked Dean, a bit confused. Sure he felt awkward when he was around crying girls, but he understood that Evangeline was hurting and that she needed to grieve. He would probably be more unsteadied if she never cried about the loss of her mother. Dean quietly used his thumb to wipe the tears from Evangeline's cheeks, wishing that there were something he could do to make her happy. He wanted to take her pain away, but he knew that he couldn't do that. It frustrated him, but Dean knew the only way for her to heal would be to allow time to take care of it.

[hungergames]

"For this, for me," Evangeline replied, giving an exasperated sigh. Pulling up her sleeves, she pointed to a deep scar, as well as other, tinier ones. "For these," she finished quietly. Clutching Dean's arm, right above where his two deep scars were. "For those." And, finally, she placed a hand against his chest. "For whatever happened here." She took both hands and placed them on his cheeks, looking sadly at Dean.

[littlebit]

"Evangeline," Dean began quietly, surprising even himself by using her full first name. He wasn't sure what he was going to do, knowing that she cut herself both frightened and angered him. Dean felt like he needed to protect her, and he felt like he was failing quite miserably. But what could he do? "What happened here," Dean began, gesturing to his chest, "isn't your fault." He released a heavy sigh, having no idea what to say next. "Please, Eva, you have no idea how much it hurts me when you hurt yourself. I'll do whatever you want, but please don't cut yourself anymore," Dean continued, practically pleading with her.

[hungergames]

Evangeline bit her lip. "I haven't cut myself for almost a week. I'm just... numb," she replied. She looked up at Dean, tearfully. "I'm sorry." Evangeline felt terrible, so terrible. "I'm done, I'm sorry, I won't do it again, please don't hurt yourself for me, don't leave me alone, don't put yourself into danger, don't..." she rambled, talking rapidly, spilling everything to Dean. She didn't want him to lose faith in her and to go away.

[littlebit]

Dean had no idea what to do, but he was starting to feel like Evangeline was needing the kind of help that he couldn't give- something which only made him more frustrated at the situation. All Dean wanted was to make it better, but he knew that he couldn't do it, there wasn't a quick-fix to her situation. "Shh," Dean said quietly, wrapping his arms around Evangeline in a protective embrace, "I'm not going anywhere."

[hungergames]

Evangeline clung to him desperately, her eyes dry for once. "I'm getting better," she insisted stubbornly, though she knew that was a false statement. She wasn't better. She wasn't worse. She was just at a new kind of depressed, one that caused her emotions to run high, for her body to feel numb. "I wish I could be better for you," she whispered hoarsely, burying her face into his chest. There, she bit her tongue, not wanting to say anymore foolish things. She had hurt herself enough, had hurt Dean enough. The last thing Evangeline wanted to do was to scare him away.

[littlebit]

Dean raised his eyebrows instinctively when Evangeline insisted that she was getting better, as far as he could tell she didn't seem to be. But he wasn't going to say anything. Her mother had been killed in November, it had only been around five months or so. That wasn't the type of thing he expected her to be upset about for a week and then be all right again. "Eva," Dean said softly, using his hand to gently lift her chin so he could look in her eyes, "you're perfect the way you are, you just need to grieve. I understand that."

[hungergames]

Evangeline held tightly to Dean, watching him warily. She half expected him to leave, to never come back. But she knew he would never do that, knew she would never be left by him. Evangeline loved Dean, with all her heart. This just proved why. She held him quietly, not sure what else to say. There was no sense getting into an argument with him, since she in no way believed she was perfect. Silence wafted over them as Evangeline watched his tearfully.

[littlebit]

Dean returned Evangeline's embrace, although he kept his grip loose, so she could pull away easily if she needed to. He wondered where her sudden fear of him leaving her had come from- he wasn't planning on doing that in the slightest. No, Dean knew that Evangeline needed him, he couldn't be so cruel as to take that away from her. Besides, he loved her, he knew it was odd with them being so young, but it was so much deeper than what could be expected of young teenagers.