new beginnings {nix}

[sterling]

Sterling couldn't help but smile, something about this was making the evening astronomically easier. Maybe it was because Nix was now relaxing, it made it easier for him to relax as well. Thankfully now there were more people joining them, it seemed that Sterling and Nix had managed to break the idea for the evening, a role which he had never thought he would have before. He usually waited for other people to begin the festivities, it went along with his rather passive, indecisive nature. Sterling continued to lead the dance, suddenly feeling very comfortable doing so since Nix looked so happy. This had been what he wanted for the evening, to see her smiling like that.

[nixnight]

Nix found the smile on her face widening as she saw the teachers begin to join the dances and she gave a small sigh, a little part of her wanted to lean her head on sterlings shoulder but she knew that she shouldn't as this was a friends only night. She shook her head again and then heard yet more sniggering coming from behind her and she rolled her eyes, it annoyed her that people were still being so stupid and shallow even on a night like this which was meant to be fun. The song began to change and it moved so something faster and the other people around them began to dance faster and nix chuckled again, this should be even more fun now

[sterling]

Sterling once again felt that foreign surge of pride within him when he saw the smile on Nix's lips widen. It felt good to know that it was at least partway through what he had done to put it there. This was the right choice, the redhead deserved to have a night of fun before responsibilities beyond her years were forced upon her. Sterling just wondered why he felt so attracted to Nix, most guys his age would turn and run in the other direction of a single pregnant woman, no matter how pretty... He shoved those thoughts from his head, he wasn't supposed to be thinking like that, she had seemed fairly insistent that he shouldn't be too involved with her. "Don't mind them," Sterling said quietly, partly to also reassure himself. He adjusted their dance to better suit the faster tempo of the new song, glad to see Nix smiling once more.

[nixnight]

*too happy, time for a break down *

Nix flicked her eyes to sterling as he spoke and she smiled again and then turned her head back to watching all those around her before she heard a small word that made her skin seem to freeze. Her hands grew tight all of a sudden and while she managed to keep herself moving, she could feel her whole body shaking and beginning to wobble a little. She could hear the whole of so ones conversation now, in cold sharp words that lashed across her ears and sent shivers down her spine

"she looks a bit fat now doesn't she"
"nah, look at her. It's a baby bump, she's pregnant"
"really? I see your point, I wonder if anyone else has seen? Maybe we should tell them..."

Nix felt her skin sear hot all of a sudden and she snapped her hand away from sterlings as her eyes began to well with tears and she turned sharply towards the voices, it was a pair of slytherin girls in shirt dress and hair and makeup that looked far too ugly for words. "go on, talk and see what happens" she said in a angry but tearful voice before she turned away and pushed through the small ring of people around the dance area with her eyes over following with tears

[sterling]

Sterling couldn't help but feel that odd sense of pride when Nix smiled again, this time directly at him. This, he was sure, was what she needed- a friend to help make her happy in a difficult time. His efforts seemingly came crashing down, however, when a pair of particularly nasty Slytherin girls made their catty remarks. Sterling saw the tears forming in her eyes, though couldn't think of something to say before she pulled away from him and pushed her way through the surrounding people. He stood rooted to the spot a brief moment, entirely unsure of what to do. And that was when the anger hit him.

He had half a mind to tell off those girls with as many choice words as he could think of, though thought better of it- Nix was more important. Sterling merely made an expression of anger, distaste, and disbelief in their direction before pushing his way through the small crowd to catch up with the tearful redhead. "Nix!" Sterling called after her, finally squeezing through the last two people at the edge of the floor before walking briskly to catch up with her stride. He sped up so he could stand directly in front of her to block her path. He cautiously wiped away a tear on her cheek with his thumb, not sure if that was crossing the "friend" boundary, so he promptly stopped.

"Why don't we take a walk?" Sterling asked quietly. Perhaps they could go by the gardens or down by the lake, they weren't likely to be disturbed there by cruel peers or couples seeking a more private place to kiss.

[nixnight]

Nix couldn't see where she was walking as the tear blurred her vision and she stumbled a lot of the time as it was now, she was a figure in front of her though and had been about to throw a fist in their face before she head sterling speak. "no, I just want to go" she said in a watery voice before she tried to move past him and get away, she wanted to go to the forest and talk to markless and miffle and the pack but she knew she couldn't. Miffle was only a werewolf pup because markless had made her change during her pregnancy and nix didn't want her baby to have to deal with that, she shook her head and then started walking again and to feel a chair on her path smash against her side. She gave a sudden yelp of pain and then whipped at her eyes to try and clear her sight before she spotted a path out of the hall and she made to move down it, alone again

This had only bought back the feeling of not wanting to burden sterling with her issues, she really liked the boy and didn't want him to suffer for what she had done and landed herself in. So the best she could do now was to run away, to stop him from trying to care so much. She would go and sit in the black lakes waters, that always made her feel better

[sterling]

Sterling stood rooted to the spot a moment, blankly staring after Nix as she pushed away from him again. He had never been rejected like that before, it stung worse than what he had thought. He felt something genuine toward the redhead- regardless of the baby and how it was not his. He was a little stunned at his own feelings, and how that didn't matter to him in the slightest. He cared about her. Sterling bit his lip, watching her leave, he wanted to yell after her, tell her to stop- though found that his mouth did not want to cooperate with him. He couldn't find words.

Sterling, after a moment, came to his senses and finally got to at least get his legs to go along with what his mind wanted and walked after her, several paces behind. He was never this persistent, but something about that girl wouldn't let him just let her go like that. She needed a shoulder to cry on, or at least Sterling thought that she did. But one thing was for sure, until she threatened to curse him or something he wasn't going to just let her walk off in that state of distress. "Nix! Wait!" Sterling called after her before breaking into a slow jog to close the gap between them.

[nixnight]

Nix had always been one for walking in the dark of the castle and even as human she was good at it so the tears that blurred her vision didn't stop her from leaving the hall, she felt the ground change below her and she walked away from the castle path and down towards the lake even though she heard sterling calling her back. Everyone would know now, and she didn't mind but it was they way they had said it all. It wasn't her fault, it had always been there, it was an accident that just happened.

She gave another sob before stopping beside a tree near the lake and leaning against it and then dropping down to curl up behind her knees, "It was always going to happen" she said in a whisper to herself and she knew that she was right on a firm level. She sighed again before lifting a hand to wipe her eyes again and then she tried to stop the tears from running, only thoughts of wolves and gingers and her adoptive family did that and she couldn't have any of those anymore. She just felt so alone

[sterling]

Sterling couldn't help but frown to himself as he walked after Nix, she seemed to not even be paying attention to the fact that he was there. Really, all he wanted to do was help, though he wasn't quite sure if there even was anything he could say to make her feel better. At any rate she was walking fairly quickly, and it was all he could do to keep up, let alone try and say something. Sterling paused as the redhead situated herself on the ground beside a tree, that protective sort of anger stirring up in him again when he saw the tears.

He still wanted to give those Slytherin girls their comeuppance, though he knew it was a stupid idea. And at any rate, he was a prefect, he wasn't supposed to be dawdling in the idea of revenge. Sterling got down beside Nix, slowly and gently slipping his arm around her shoulders, keeping her close enough for be comforting, but holding her loosely enough so she could pull away if she really didn't want him. Sterling didn't say anything, he wasn't sure if he could even find words for the situation, so he kept quiet.

[nixnight]

Nix felt the air around her shift and her body wanted to lean away but she couldn't move, her body felt stiff. She felt sterlings arm around her and she couldn't help but lean backwards from the way her logic told her to go and she leaned against his shoulder and felt her tears begin to dry from under her eyes.

"sorry, I over reacted" she said in a small voice as she tried to stop the tears, it didn't work of course and more dark patches beside her face as she leaned on the other boy. "you shouldn't have followed. This isn't your issue to deal with" she said a watery voice before she lifted her head slowly and then she looked at the other boy with a firm look. "I don't want you dealing with this when none of it is something you need to" she said with a slightly stronger voice as she tried to seem like she wasn't so upset anymore

[sterling]

Sterling took it as a good sign when Nix leaned into him rather than pulling away. In a way, it made him feel better, knowing that he could at least be of some comfort to the poor girl. He gently rubbed her upper arm with his hand, he remembered his mother doing that to him as a child- he thought it a soothing gesture. Although he did feel it was a bit beyond the "friend" barrier, he used the side of his finger to wipe away the remnants of the tears still on her cheeks. "No, don't apologize," said Sterling, "what they did was unnecessary and cruel."

Sterling wasn't sure what to say. He knew that it was not his problem, of course, but he was instinctively drawn to Nix like he had never been drawn to anyone before. He wanted to protect and care for her, be the one to hold her in his arms... He shoved those thoughts from his head when Nix insisted she didn't want him dealing with it. Sterling frowned slightly, the words hurt like hell, but he couldn't allow himself to be shoved away at that particular moment. He sighed. "I'll leave you alone if that's what you really want," said Sterling, "but not until after tonight."

[nixnight]

Nix felt two feelings bubble up inside her. The first said she was being stupid and would need someone soon so she should stop beginning so stubborn and let the boy help if he really wanted to, it was his life and he could chose to spend it anyway he chose to. The other said he was being stupid and shouldn't still be here. She didn't want anyone to suffer the pains she has already has to deal with in life, it was one of the biggest parts of her and she was sure it was the reason she was in gryffindor. But her tears and the walking and all the emotions had tired her and she didn't have the energy to push him away now, she could not and would not let him suffer the pains she had been forced to but she would just him comfort her today. Today only

[sterling]

When Nix did not respond to him, Sterling figured that it was her way of granting him permission to stay, if only for tonight. Though the idea of not being involved with her after this night pained him. As much as he wouldn't say it because it would be awkward, Sterling did care about Nix a great deal- regardless of whether or not she wanted to be cared for. He just didn't want her to feel like she was alone, he could suppress the almost romantic feelings he had and just be a friend, but to leave her be entirely... Sterling could barely stomach the thought of it. He continued to gently rub her upper arm not sure what to do with the silence, or even what to do with himself once the night was over.

[nixnight]

Nix felt the wind blow over her skin and she shivered and couldn't help but lean closer to sterling to try and keep herself warmer, the breeze called back her wishes to join the pack again and the pain stuck her heart again. She shook herself and then looked over towards the starlight coated black lake ,"why are you here? Why won't you just leave and let me deal alone?" she said in a small voice. She didn't want to push him away as she had accepted his comfort today but she really did want to know why he seemed so set on working on her and grinding her down to allow him to stay with her

[sterling]

Again Sterling felt that familiar increase of pride when Nix leaned into him just a little more. He wasn't even paying attention to the cold anymore, even if his fingers were starting to go just a little numb. He could handle it if it meant that Nix was comfortable. He thought a moment when Nix asked why he was there. Was it so wrong that he wanted to help? Though her tone did sound more curious than accusatory. Truthfully, he wasn't quite sure what to say, he didn't think she would appreciate his admitting his feelings for her, at least not right now. "I don't think anyone should feel like they're alone," said Sterling after a pause, leaving it at that. He drew his wand a quick moment and conjured a magical fire that bathed them in a warm glow, he then just as quickly put his wand away.